RIP Lisa Dunn

Sunday July 13, after a weekend of much family love, my wife Lisa Dunn passed on following a battle with multiple ailments. Though we have been separated for years, we were, and will always be close and connected. She gave me perhaps the most precious gift of my lifetime. Not only did she take my name, love and adore my son, she taught me how to really love. Just love, without agenda, without purpose, just love. So many of you were touched by her passion. This we can share forever.

There were times in her life when she could treat herself with a special purchase, but most of the time she looked great with an assembly from the bargain racks. Somehow she always shone, whether a fuller figured lady, or even when she was withered and thin. Just the right hat, jacket or scarf and she looked great-she also had a way of helping friends look better with a slight addition or two-even the always disheveled yours truly. Lisa had style.

She didn't really care about anything material. Probably less than any western woman I ever knew. So many of you know this personally for if she knew you for any amount of time, she surely gave you something of hers. All gift givers are wonderful, but those who give so freely of their own possessions are a special breed. All of us close to her have boxes of her stuff stored away that she has never gotten around to reclaiming-after all, “something lost means time for something new.” She even shared her greatest love, Jasper the cat. Every time she missed him so much that she wanted to reclaim him for herself, she would always finish by saying, “its ok, you two need each other more right now.” Lisa was never oriented to things or even accomplishments. What mattered to her was whom she was with at that moment-whether human, an animal or a tree-yes she spoke to and found peace in trees of all shapes and sizes. When her beloved SF Giants were in the post season, the stress would often force her to walk away from the TV screen and go talk with a tree. The only non-living items that were really important to her were something worthy of being consumed in the next 5 minutes.

Cry, I'm not sure I have ever known anyone who has shed more tears. Whether from anxiety, pain, joy or hunger, Lisa's eyes never hid her emotions. As much as she loved travel, she would have a panic attack on every plane, train or ferry. Once I came up with the idea that we had to kiss every time the planes wheels left and returned to the runway she did better, but there would still always be tears shed. After 9-11 she was so afraid that for two years our travel was limited to our driving to Las Vegas (It was almost all her driving since she was always too nervous as a passenger). It was an honor to help her bright eyes dry out when life did not go according to plan. It was also a great pleasure to turn her leaky caldrons loose with any kind of loving surprise. Lisa's young soul is very connected to God and love but struggled with evil and human complication.

Many of you know Lisa's real soul mate is our cat Jasper. As he approached 18 years of age a couple of months ago, I was afraid his time to pass was near. She came and spent three days with him, while I went away. She later told me that she only left him for one half-hour. Jasper seemed to catch a second wind thereafter. My friend Renee sent me a message a few days ago saying she felt God granted Jasper a 10th life to keep me company through this difficult time. I can't also help but wonder if Jasper was determined to hang on so instead of Lisa facing the heartache of his passing, something she always said she couldn't possibly handle, she would just know the joy of welcoming him to her new world.

Many of you know her passion to make people laugh. Our Friend Wynne always said, “Lisa is the funniest person I ever knew. No one made me laugh as much as she did.” Whether ridiculous or irreverent, she could make anyone smile and laugh. Did you ever see her make a unicorn horn or her Martha Washington imitation out of her thick big hair? She could turn anyone into a friend in a matter of minutes, no matter where, no matter what your differences.

Thirteen was way to young to lose a father; I also feel way to young to lose a wife. I guess it is never too early or too late to remember to cherish any time with a special person. Lisa is the one person to know more about me than my mother. RIP Lisa Dunn, Nar loves Nar-you will always be with me.

Your Nar, Deamer

Lisa’s obituary: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/montereyherald/obituary.aspx?n=lisa-michelle-dunn&pid=171808678

20 Minute Music Video of Lisa Dunn with her family and friends